I wish I were a ring Upon my girlfriend's hand, 'Cause everytime she'd wipe her rear I'd see the promised land....
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Are these your eyes, I found them between my breasts!
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Hello!Im a little alien called Kan.I have taken the form of a mobile
phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with
your thumb!
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I once had a ONE-2-ONE night with a VIRGIN.She teased me till i got an ERICKSON.sucked me till my face went ORANGE till i busted my load of SEIMEN over her NOKIAS.
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I hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 69 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks & sex appeal, remain silent & report 2 my bedroom.
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A man was looking at a painting 4 a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he was doing & he answered - waitng 4 autumn.
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GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!
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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.
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American students say : people who never experience good sex and do not perform well in bed, usually read their SMS messages with their right hand.
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A guy walks up to a girl and says: Wanna play *Magic*? She says: What's that? He says: We go to my place, have sex and than you disappear!
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A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone. Amitabh bachan in KBC
Question for 10 lac to Sardar jee
What is the colour of your wife's underwear?
Option 1 : White
Option 2 : Grey
Option 3 : Black
Option 4 : Blue
Sardar jee : Can i phone a friend?
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Sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temptation, putting his location in a
woman's destination. Do you understand the explanation or do you need a
demonstration?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A peach is a peach,a plum is a plum,A kiss ain't a kiss without some tongue.So
open up your mouth and close you eyes and give your tongue some exercises!!
There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ...NO SEX ! A girl for First the time was handling a boy's cock. After some time, some drops
came out, she asked wat's that? The boy said:Yeh Khushi ke AANSOO hai.
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Niple niple little star ...can i suck you in my car ...up above the breast so
have...always milky never dry...let me touch it never shy...in the bra it
will be dry ...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What is a kiss?
A: Very simple, its an enquiry at the top floor about the vacancy in the ground.
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When I went to the Madras,
I fucked a lady on the grass...
When I insert inch One,
She says its none...
When I insert inch Two
She says its few...
When I insert inch Three,
She says its free...
When I insert inch Four,
She says its i want more...
When I insert inch Five,
She says its just like a knife...
When I insert inch Six,
She says its fix...
When I insert inch Seven,
She says i m feeling in a heaven...
When I insert inch Eight,
She says its great...
When I insert inch Nine,
She says its hole of mine...
When I insert inch Ten,
She says are you a donkey or a man...
Submitted By : Syed Mohsin Ali, Submit
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Sex is like a restaurant, sometimes u get good service, sometimes bad service, sometimes no service and many times u hav 2 be happy wid self service.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If u hav 2 eggs between ur 2 legs u r a man but if u hav 4 eggs
between ur 2 legs don't think u r a superman someone is F**king u
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Did u know meaning of WOMEN?
"W"ant
"O"ne
"M"an for
"E"very
"N"ight
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
how is sex related to maths?..add two person and a bed..substract
cloths..divide the legs..multiply the strokes..and the result is
satisfucktion..!aha!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman married
a one legged man.
She wrote to her
mother:
"My husband only has
ONE FOOT".
Her Mother
replied:
"You are lucky,
your papa has
ONLY 5 INCHES".
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Girl to Doctor: My mobile got stuck in my vagina since last 4 days in
vibration mode.
Doctor: OK, I will remove this easily.
Girl: Just recharge the battery.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A gud friend is like a gud bra... hard 2 find- comfortable-
supportive- prevents u from falling- holds u tight- and is always close 2 ur
heart!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2 men went to fuck a girl.
1st came out after fucking a girl n said...
''My wife is better''
2nd went in ,fuck a girl... Came out n said...
''U were right, your wife is better..
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In chemistry class teacher ask 2 a Girl. what is nitrate?
Girl(sharma k) sir,night rate Rs1500/ hotel k bhi aap pay karo gay.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How To Teach Mathmatics To A Girl.
1st add lips
2nd minus clothes
3rd divide legs
and then start Multiplication in the Sweetest Point.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Always start your day with a lot of... S E X
S - SMILE
E - ENERGY
X - XCITEMENT
so make S E X a daily habit, and youll always B SUCSEXFUL! in LIFE.
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